I often get funny pictures, stories, or jokes in email.  Rather than forwarding them to my friends who probably already have a copy, I've placed them here for everyone to enjoy.

Pictures are accessed through the links to the left.  High speed connections are recommended for most of these as they are fairly large (exceptions are "Dishes" and "Camera" which are small enough for dial-up).  The stories are below.

My Top 10 List (Rated R) !

Talk about getting burned...

A Charlotte, NC lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars and then insured them against fire among other things. Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars, the lawyer filed a claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the lawyer stated the cigars were lost "in a series of small fires." 

The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason: that the man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion. The lawyer sued....and won!

In delivering the ruling the judge agreed with the insurance company that the claim was frivolous. The Judge stated nevertheless, that the lawyer held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure them against fire, without defining what is considered to be "unacceptable fire," and was obligated to pay the claim. 

Rather than endure a lengthy and costly appeal process, the insurance company accepted the ruling and paid $15,000.00 to the lawyer for his loss of the rare cigars lost in the "fires."  

NOW FOR THE BEST PART...

After the lawyer cashed the check, the insurance company had him arrested on 24 counts of ARSON!!!! With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being used against him, the lawyer was convicted of intentionally burning his insured property and he was sentenced to 24 months in jail and ordered to pay a $24,000 fine.

This is a true story and was the 1st place winner in the Criminal Lawyers Award Contest. 

The Fishing Trip

A couple goes on vacation to a fishing trip in Oregon. The husband likes to fish at the crack of dawn. The wife likes to read.

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and continues to read her book. 

Along comes a game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?" 

"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking "isn't that obvious?") 

"You're in a restricted fishing area," he informs her. 

"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading."

 "Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."

 "If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman. 

"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment." 

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads.  It's likely she can also think.